you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Success! We fucked roommates!
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
