OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
