I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
