that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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