Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
