i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
