What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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