We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
