He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
