I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
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