my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
