Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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