I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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