Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
