i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
i now understand why vodka
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
