I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Randomize
