im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
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