So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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