He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I fill condoms, not promises.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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