the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
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