I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..