I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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