I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
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