Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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