Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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