my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I just want nice things and good sex
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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