Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
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