Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
