I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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