How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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