his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
It's never too late to be topless.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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