I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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