What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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