K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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