So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
