I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
