The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
