I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
