I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
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