I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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