he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
