Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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