p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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