my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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