Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
you made out with another girl for some wings
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Randomize
