Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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