why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
