how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
