the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
