Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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